Quarantine have been a way to curb infectious diseases for centuries. In fact, it was used to end the second recorded plague in history — the Black Death.
And that pretty much explains the idea behind the CDC’s instruction on practising social distancing. The Nigerian federal government like the rest of the world, gave lockdown directives but only in three states which are Abuja, Lagos and Kano while the governors of the other states lockdown the other states as a preventive measure.
Although the now relaxed lockdown was well-intentioned — to flatten the curve — love and relationships were affected, some in not so pleasant ways. The lockdown somehow ended up being both good and bad news.
Bad News First
It appears some marital relationships turned sour. There’s something odd about transitioning from seeing each other only for a few hours a day to every hour of the day. Presumably, the first few days of the lockdown may have been like a honeymoon until the days gradually turned to weeks.
For those dating, the reverse was the case; they ironically went from seeing each other a few times a week to scarcely in a month or more because of the lockdown.
In both cases, the sudden change can be a rude awakening, especially considering the fact that no one braced for this.
In China, for instance, there was a spike in divorce cases in March. Asides being mostly attributed to fussing over trivial matters, a common problem was poor communication.
In the US — several miles from that region — marriage therapists are experiencing an increase in demand online, also in the same month.
These challenges seem to be the reason extramarital affairs on dating websites are thriving among some couples who have either realised they have mismatched personalities or have always been unfaithful.
What does this mean? During a lockdown, everything is digital, even infidelity! But, given the vast possibilities when it comes to Internet use, with many pursuing their indiscretions online, it is alright to flip the coin.
Now to the good news
While it strangely seems being together is causing married couples to drift apart, the experience in courtships is quite different. Clearly, familiarity breeds contempt and absence makes the heart fonder.It is a general knowledge that as humans adapt to changes, disruptions can occur. While a number of discussions have addressed the psychology in this, the crux of the discussions have always been either the necessity of having one’s space shared or having it invaded when it comes to a relationship.
For someone who have been in long-distance relationship, Andrew* takes this period as one of the challenges he and his partner have in the past, and handles it rather well with a very potent hack therefore, be it a long distance relationship or a relationship of proximity, continuous communication is a key element.
To some in a relationship of proximity says that the lockdown makes them cherish every minute they spend with their partners and on the other hand those in a long distance relationship especially the guys says that the lockdown has allowed some money savings. Apart from the cost of Internet data, it is clear that online dating is quite economical. Some have expressed hidden love and the relationships have blossom through the period of lockdown.
We discovered a common trend in how digital tools have helped partners connect despite the distance through video calls. Cheers to tech!
This further validates the report that video calls are fast becoming as popular as voice calls, primarily because of the face-to-face feel they give which help with keeping in touch as watching your partner eat, work on the laptop, or scroll through social media while doing your own thing gives a feeling of their presence.Most persons have stuck with WhatsApp video calls for different reasons also the VAT on voice calls and Sms have made some stick with WhatsApp video calls. Others have connected through social media networks like iMessage, Instagram, and Twitter.
Well, will the new normal be altered after the lockdown?
Many are of the opinion that this depends strongly on what each person thinks is best for their relationship hence, a different reality after lockdown as busy schedules will pop up leading to strain in communication. It is important for partners to plan ahead for the life after the lockdown make plans on how to plan bigger dates and engage in fun activities.
It is important to keep the flow in a relationship no matter the challenge because consistency in a relationship is a proof of how much it can stand the test of time. From kayrenemmanuel.wordpress.com
Karen Emmanuel; The Lifestyle Blog 